I’m in NYC for a few days, and finally decided that if anyone was going to teach me about makeup, it was going to be Sephora,  My favorite lipstick, which I never wear because it’s pretty intense, came from Sephora, a present to myself for my first publication sale to some nerd magazine about chem-free college dorm life (Oneida 4 A-L REPRESENT!) and I am finally able to afford maybe one little treat for myself.

I went into the store at Union Square and was immediately terrified.  Too much color.  Can I wear green eyeliner or will I look like a bad drag queen? (not an awesome one like Miss Uschi)  What do I do with THAT cream?  OH GOD HOW MUCH STUFF DO I HAVE TO PUT ON MY FACE?  Moisturizers, primers, glitter, bronzer . . . I almost had a panic attack standing in front of the Urban Decay stand.

Luckily, Desiree, who was wearing insane purple glitter eye shadow and rich dark red lipstick came to my rescue.  “You’re beautiful, and I’m going to tell you straight because you’re putting your trust in me,” she said in a thick, sassy accent  She even sat me down and dusted my face with Bare Minerals primer powder, smeared some bronzer on me and turned me loose in the mirror.

I could not believe what I saw.  I was beautiful.  I was a knock-out.  I looked like a doll.  My skin was even, flawless, perfect.  Wow.

I didn’t buy the primer.  Not at $27, but she packed a sample up for me and I’ll try to find a similar one back home.  But she showed me this awesome Moxie lipgloss which satisfied my desire to look like a dame while not leaving thick smears of dark red lipstick all over my coffee cups, and I picked up an electric blue eyeliner pencil because HECK YEAH.

I will probably never be a heavily made-up dame.  Desiree was cool with that.  She didn’t try to dump a bunch of products I would never use.  She showed me some tools for beauty and, better still, taught me that I had the power to use them.  And damn if that lipgloss doesn’t bring out my big wet smacker (easily my best feature)